I believe I was told early Sunday morning, in convoluted words, that my dream of Cultivating Beauty will not be possible because people will not want to hear it – that people will not want to see the ugly side of me because they will not be willing to face the ugly side of themselves. And as a conclusion, I was graced with the implication that it will therefore not be possible that we cultivate beauty together.
Now, I could be reading more into the words that I read than was actually there, most notably based upon my past experience with “haters”, but whether I am or not really is not the point here that I am trying to make. The point is this…
I want what I dream. I don’t care if it hasn’t been done before, I don’t care if people’s prior responses may indicate failure, I don’t care that I may fail, I don’t care about any of that. I feel lucky…no, no ughh!! I feel blessed that I’ve had, on so many prior occasions in my life, so many people tell me that I just can’t do it. I can’t major in Mathematics, I won’t get into law school, I’m not smart enough to graduate from law school, I’ll never be able to pass the bar exam, on occasion the person who’s been telling me this garbage has even been myself! But I don’t believe it. When it comes down to the nitty gritty and a hard-fast decision must be made, I choose me, I choose my dreams, and if anyone else wants to say it’s not going to be possible, then they can sit along the sidelines with the others and watch as the dreamers make it so.
I just get so tired of hearing it is all. It makes me angry that there are still people out there telling children that their dreams aren’t possible. What do these people even know? Nothing…it has nothing to do with the dreamer, and everything to do with the speaker. If these people who believe that dreams are not possible choose to continue to ingest this mind poison, boy I sure do wish they would just keep it to themselves. I hate that they’re out there poisoning the minds of dreamers as well, young and old.
So anyways, I can’t save the world, or…at least, I cannot save the entire world today. But I can tell you my dreams as well as I can regurgitate them at the present moment, in all their glory and phantasm…and I can remind anyone out there who may set their eyes upon these words – don’t forget to dream…and don’t let anyone take that away from you either…
- Finish piecing together Cultivating Beauty (my first book and greatest work) before June 20, 2014 – my 33rd birthday;
- Win a Nobel Peace Prize of some sort for promoting the greater peace amongst human beings;
- Win a Pulitzer Prize for my writing (I can’t remember what those are awarded for at the moment – but I’m sure it’s applicable in some way, shape or form, or could be at some point);
- To be a mother to at least one child – adopted and/or biological, ideally four;
- To leave this world with more good in it than when I arrived here to start;
- To promote greater peace, compassion and understanding of others amongst the human race;
- To love as hard as I possibly can for as many seconds as I possibly can while I’m living upon this earth;
- To create as much love as I possibly can to share with as many others as I can possibly reach;
- To be a real, live writer the way I see it in my head – including spending days with my children in the meadows, reading them stories and singing and playing and dancing and sharing in their joy, then putting them to bed and going to my study and writing like a mad hatter in an attempt to capture all of the beauty that I see; and
- THIS IS A BIG ONE, AND IT’S TIME SENSITIVE TOO, SO I’M REALLY GOING TO HAVE TO WORK HARD AT IT QUICKLY–to be awarded a purple heart by my hero Mr. President Barack Hussein Obama while he’s acting in office (…I know, I know I’m not in the military, but you hear these universities giving out “honorary degrees” all the time…I’m sure some similar allowance could be made in this instance…).
See…it’s fun!! (Once you get over the initial embarrassment ;0) Sure, perhaps they won’t all come true…but then again, perhaps I’ll get hit by a bus this afternoon and be dead! What’s the use in worrying about whether or not they won’t come true? If you don’t dare to dream in the first place, you’re making sure of that before you even begin! So dare to dream!! It’s the most wonderful activity in this whole entire world…even better than writing (and that means a lot, coming from me).