Reflection from January 9th, 2017 @ Age 35
I just got the feeling Aunt Jean knows things she wishes she didn’t know—in a manner which would make sense of her feigned trauma in reaction to my compassionate love. Disgusting things—the kinda things where someone would play right into the hand of a feigned “prince charming,” only to turn into a nightmare in the long run. Same goes for Prince Harry’s paternal grandmother—err, well, lol…
Did, or at the very least seems to’ve—as far as I would know, given the extent of my knowledge on the matter to-date which consists of ‘The Crown’ Season 1 on Netflix.
Which I just finished up, “to’day* ;oD
Wow. Some shady males, doin’ some shady-ass business—all in the “name” of religion. I would say, the shadiest—for males. Slim Shady exempted from the bunch, but of course—in the fairest sense of having been saved, n’all.
And, as for females—Shady Lady took the crown back, as we all know. With blood and fire and fire-breathing—magical, fire-breathing dragons but of course. All that good stuff—that never actually ceased, being hers.
It is devastating. It is devastating that a beautiful young girl was enticed, into a whirlwind “romance”—only to later find out she’d been used (and see, here—I do mean, used) as a spiritual channel, through which to suck the life out of me and God (does) know whom else.
And, it is devastating that upon learning same—said girl’d already, be “married” with children. Fuck us over, and we’ll suck the life out’a you and your children Ms. Mama Bear—but stay, and we’ll do the same.
The game was over for her with “I do” at conception. And so, she stayed—and they took her life, in any case. But then, they tried to take the lives of her three children—and, notably, Nathan’s. And, there I was, and he saw me and read my book and watched the movie—and started, questioning. And then, Mama Bear had to decide; and already buried (herself, in plastic) alive—she too, decided she would rather die, than too, also take her children’s lives. She would rather die in the wake of her own hideous truth as seen, through their eyes—than allow the cycle to continue on as it has, generation after generation after generation.
And, so the truth is complex and they are disturbed, and do not know—how they’ll ever be able to see her the way that they used to, in the “good” ol’ days of Yore. And, they will continue on growing towards the light, and in good time—so too, also come, to forgive her. Because, that is—the only way, to break the curse. That, is why—forgiveness, MATTERS.
P.S. I can totally see now, why Grandpa Sabik chose me—to lead, the family.
Wow. And then, I’ve got Ruth Bader Ginsburg—on whisper, here in the back of my ear…
I’ve never felt so externally alive, before. It’s hard to imagine how that could even be—all this change, the result of one voice, singing out into the Universe from within her own captivity.
She is real ;0)