ATTENTION:  “HI(S)TORY” — One, Two, **Someone’s** COMIN’ For You ;0)

Reflection from January 20th, 2017 @ Age 35



Well, Obama is over and out—Trump is over and in, and I feel relatively blah

Raw, really—if you prefer specificity.


In addition, my toe feels weird.  Lol.  Yep

It’s true.  Left foot, middle toe (of the five—you know)—it’s like, I can feel

Like, I can for whatever reason, feel—the skin on that toe (just the one, there) that connects the nail to, the toe.  So, I guess…

If you were just sitting at the kitchen table before your S.A.D. lamp (as am I), then—down beneath the table inside your double-socked, left-foot winter Sorel boot, tip of the top of that middle toe, right…

The skin right behind, the middle of the top of that toe’s nail, there—in that location, the skin tissue that (I guess…) “latches” onto the back of that nail there…

Of all the physical receptors on my body receiving external stimuli from my surrounding environment here—that’s the most prominent, physical feeling I’m presently feeling.  Isn’t that, kinda weird?

I don’t mean “weird” in a bad sense, at all—what I mean, is that, well…

It just does seem, curiously specific—is all.  Very, specific—lol…


Anyway, the point is merely that I’ve had this happen many, many times before—since the psychological recalibration, back in November 2014 I think it was.  Getting feeling back, inside my body—physical feeling err, sensations I suppose, better put.  And, it always happens, just like this—noticing a curiously specific “weird” feeling somewhere in my body, ‘cept now, my thought (err, well, consciousness) almost immediately (i.e. in most circumstance) connects that thought-response of “weird feeling” to regaining…

Well, I suppose, to the concept of regaining physical—consciousness (!)—within my body.  Actually kinda reminds me of this intro I watched to one of these old-school Jane Fonda workout videos I’d gotten—ohh, I dunno…

Just probably a few months back, I got them from Amazon—I think maybe, just after the 2016, November election.  Whenever it was, the thought was that—sigh

Whenever it was, is when it was—which was when I was having trouble actually getting out of bed and functioning.

I can look it up actually, when it was—and report back


But, for now, the important point to note—would be that I watched the introduction after doing the workout, because I love Jane Fonda.  Don’t, ask me why—I mean, you can, if you want.  But frankly, I don’t know why

Ohh wait!  You know what?!  I do remember why—or at least, how it all kinda evolved into happening, in any case.  I think, maybe last September 2016?  I dunno—just somewhere around there—my mom and I watched in the span of maybe like, a week

That whole first season of Grace and Frankie—the show on Netflix, about the two totally opposite alpha-matriarchs, who hate each other until they’re forced into a super emotionally charged and traumatic situation, wherein the only two options left available are:  [1] complete emotional isolation, or [2] the casting aside of all their differences—which then, enables them to comfort each other, in the sense of sharing in their, well…

The sociologically-induced trauma surrounding their circumstantially, similarly-situated misery.  Whew!  That’s a mouthful ;oD


Noting, that I can still feel my toe


My mom and I had just, sometime prior to the time period within which my now long-belabored point—has in fact, fallen



Okay.  Mom and I watched that, then, in addition—Jane Fonda pics of when she was younger kept popping up on these “Lost in History” and “History Lovers” Twitter feeds I follow—many of which I would then retweet, into my Twitter feed—because, like I said, I just love her.

And, to be entirely honest, I’m not even sure what else I’ve ever yet seen her in—aside from Monster-in-Law I think it’s called, with Jennifer Lopez.  And then, Frankie and Grace on Netflix—“historical” Twitter pics and really, I think that’s it!

So anyway, my mom and I watched that show and simultaneously at that time (whenever it was), I’d already entered into—actually, that period of not feeling well.  And so, I was talkin’ to my mom about it, right—and we were watching that show, and she just happened then, to recommend Jane Fonda’s workout videos.  I think maybe they were really a big thing, you know—with “women” back in the 80s like my mom, when I was just a little girl.

So anyway…


So. many. any. ways!  No big deal—just, keep going!


So I got on Amazon, and looked it up!  And there were, a ton of Jane Fonda workout videos—which led me, to feeling very overwhelmed.  And, in addition, due to my…



Due to the manner in which the overall, general aesthetic of Amazon’s website—sigh

Love Amazon, but their website aesthetics—not so much…

Right, and so, consequently—well, due to that combined with my not feeling well, plus the overarching feeling of being generally overwhelmed…

Due to the wide-selection combined with Amazon’s lack of aesthetic “value”—sigh…


Alright, mama’s taking me to the corner for cigs—so, just to finish this thought real quick…

I ended up making a real quick decision on the Amazon Jane Fonda videos.  So, they arrived, and as it turned out—they were the videos she made, of workouts, more recently, I guess.  Or, in other words, not the ones where she’s super young and wearing thong leotards over tights—but, rather, the ones where she’s older and the workouts are more gentle (i.e. for people havin’ lack of energy to even get out of bed kinda problems—err at least, as was applicable, to my situation).  Whew

So I get the videos, do one workout—love her, watch her intro, and she talks about the consequences on women who’ve experienced sexual assault.  And then, later—I ended up looking her up, on Wikipedia!  And, was so taken by surprise regarding her involvement in—VIETNAM!

I had no idea!!!!!!!


So anyways, those are the important parts to keep in mind—but I’ll finish this thought when I get back.  Gotta go!

All my love!


Okay—I just got out’a the shower, so I’ma make this quick

And then, get back to the Q-Tips, lotioning, etc. etc.—you know, what I mean…

So, sigh

Okay, baaasically—whilst sitting in the bath tub I got, to thinking…

And, essentially, taking into consideration the role that I did play in American politics, these past—let’s see…

Uhh, October 2013 to January 2017 = 3-1/3 years, right—taking that into consideration, in the “underground-rap-esque” sense in which it is applicable, generally speaking…

Well, that’s what I was thinking about, when it occurred to me—I really do wonder, what else was left out of those (F.K.A.) “history” textbooks I read throughout school as a kid.

I mean, bear with me—it seems at the moment, my mind is just barely, functioning


But, honestly, it would definitely—make sense of my long-former inquiry, as to why in the world, well…


Just in terms of, well, storytelling—it sure would explain the “dry” nature, of hi(s)tory.


12 thoughts on “ATTENTION:  “HI(S)TORY” — One, Two, **Someone’s** COMIN’ For You ;0)

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