ON FREEDOM — Finding The Meaning ;0)

Reflection from July 30th, 2014 @ Age 33

RE:  CLIMBING THE STAIRWAY OF CONSCIOUSNESS.

Still feeling rather like I’m living in purgatory…but I’m up, protein-fed, dog walked, and ready to move ahead…

Here we shall go…

We’ll see what happens!!

;0/

Later

It’s almost as if I keep waking up, and things go really well, except then I keep falling back to sleep, and once that happens—it becomes very difficult to wake myself up once again.

It’s absolutely, endlessly frustrating ;0/

I don’t know what to do about it quite just yet…

Suffer and learn, suffer and learn…

And the seasons begin to turn…

Will I ever be released from this cycle of suffering?

When the time comes for action I suppose…

In any case, I’m self-censoring once again…

It disgusts me, and so I’ll go…

Just after I apologize once more.

Later

All I see is a wall before me…

I don’t know how to overcome it…

I don’t know how to find the answer inside of me either…

I’m a searching, and yet still, I cannot find it.

I don’t know what I’m searching for.

Later

I feel like I cannot breathe…

Time is moving so slowly and I feel as if I cannot breathe, and every moment is at once torture, but also a continuing chance to become free once again…

Once again…

Which reminds me then, that I have been free before.  When riddle me this I do wonder…

When was it, that I was free last?

When was it?  When was the time…

At birth, and no further beyond?

When, was the time?

Sigh…see, I keep getting stuck like this…

So sticky are the affairs in which I now deal

;0)

So I suppose, a blessing I must be for this world…

Untangling the tangled mess…stick, stuck and then I free myself…

Later

In the meantime, I suppose it’s just like adjusting to a new altitude…

In fact, maybe that is, what I am doing :0)

Baaaahhhahhahahhahah!!